Wolves plus Fleas equals Giant Fur Ball
by Marker Sniffing Productions
Summary: Just a short little humorous story I made up one day. The wolf pack gets fleas, and where dogs scratch, there's fur. Lots and lots of fur.


It was summer and Jacob was sitting on the couch, scratching. He groaned as he felt another flea bite appearing. He grabbed his arm and scratched furiously. Billy looked at him.

"Go outside and get rid of those! If I find one crawling on the couch…" Jacob rolled his eyes and went out the back door. He took off his clothes and changed into his wolf form.

_Stupid fleas!!! _

Jacob perked up when he heard Quail's voice. He scratched behind his ear before hurrying over to Quil.

The chocolate-brown wolf was scratching against the bark of the forest trees. Jacob barked at him and he looked up.

_Fleas too?_

_Yeah. I don't know if anyone else has them. _

Quil growled and bit on his shoulder. Jacob scratched his back on a tree.

_MOTHERFUCKING FLEAS!! _

Jacob and Quil looked up. _Paul! _

They ran a few miles deeper into the woods and stared. Paul, Sam, Embry, Jared, Leah and Seth were scratching and biting, leading to a pile of fur in the middle of a circle.

_Wow. Flea-pendemic! _Sam growled at Quil.

_Who got the fleas first?!! _Everyone looked at each other.

_Uh…me. _Seth looked away from a chorus of growls. Jacob growled at the others.

_Who cares who got it first?! We need to find a way to get rid of them! _He scratched his furry neck, leading to a larger pile of fur than before.

"Someone looking for some flea collars?" The wolves looked over at Bella. Paul growled at her, but she glared at him. Jacob changed back.

"How did you know?"

"Billy called my dad and asked for me. He told me what was going on." She giggled a little when Jacob started to gnaw on his arm. She pulled out flea collars from the plastic bag.

"These are supposed to be used for dogs right?" She nodded.

"I got more than enough to make them larger. You have to stay in your wolf form for a few weeks." Paul growled but Sam shut him up. Jacob nodded.

"I'll get them put on. Thanks Bella." She nodded.

"Take care. And get rid of that fur ball." He blushed a little and nodded. He turned around and started hooking the flea collars to each wolf. Leah turned up her nose but he glared her down.

"I'll be back." He hurried to his house. "Dad!"

"What?" Billy saw the wolf nudging a flea collar toward him. Billy smirked and picked it up. Jacob leaned his head towards him and Billy snapped it onto his neck. "You'll be a wolf for a few weeks right?" Jacob whined and he smirked.

"You'll be fine."

_Jacob! Get your ass back here! _

Jacob growled low in his throat and hurried back to Embry. The fur ball had gotten larger and Jacob shook his head.

_You know it's going to take awhile to work._

_WE KNOW THAT!_

He glared at them.

_Shut up! At the end of the summer, we'll be as good as new._

-_-_-

A week later, there was less fleas in the pack. The fur ball on the other hand, had grown to the size of two large tumbleweeds. Leah was the first to bring it up.

_Does anyone have any ideas about how to get rid of these? _Everyone stopped scratching. Sam was the first to answer.

_We could burn it, or we'll hide it in one of the root gnarls over there. _

_Great idea! _Jacob nosed the fur over to one of the trees. It landed with a soft flump in the roots.

_Perfect, it should stay there for awhile. _

-_-_-

Bella came back at the end of the summer and found the wolves without fleas. She undid the flea collars and they all changed back, stretching and popping their joints.

"Better?"

"Yes! Thanks!" Even Paul was grateful to her.

"You're welcome. I hope this doesn't happen again." The pack nodded.

"Same here Ms. Swan. Seth, stay away from us if you have fleas!" Seth blushed and lowered his head.

-_-_-

A few weeks later, Jacob was with Bella in the woods. They were laughing and talking, enjoying a nice Saturday.

"Uh, Jacob, what's that?" Jacob looked up and followed her finger. He flushed a deep red. The tumbleweed of fur was rolling down a slope. A few seconds later, it was gone. Bella looked up at Jacob and they burst out laughing.

"BLACK!!!" Jacob looked and saw Leah covered from head to foot in fur. "This is mostly your fur, you know!"

"Suck it Leah!" Bella laughed and Jacob smiled.


End file.
